That’s the claim made by Newry and Armagh Cista election candidate, Emmet Crossan.
We decided to get in touch with Emmet this morning to see what basis he had to make such a wild accusation. After a few hours of trying, we finally were able to wake him out of his slumber just after lunchtime. “What makes you think it was Tony Blair that stole your election posters?” we asked the laidback wannabe politician.
“At first we just assumed it was the usual ballbags an’ bigots that had taken’ down our posters to adorn their bonfires in July. Nothin’ new there, we thought. But the next day Tony “The Warmonger” Blair was all over the telly with somethin’ very familiar an’ recognisable to us.”
“So Tony turned up on national TV with one of your posters?” we asked.
“Not exactly, Tony’s much too cunning to do somethin’ so blatant. It was our election slogan “Rise Up” that he was spouting to the assembled media an’ anybody else that would listen. We couldn’t believe our ears. The day after our posters went missin’ and our election slogan was heard coming out of the mouth of a man who never had an original thought in his life, we just put two and two together and came up with the only an’ obvious answer, “Tony fuckin’ Blair stole our posters.”
Well when it’s put like that, we would have to agree with the Lemmester. It does seem the most obvious conclusion to draw. Tony Blair definitely did steal his posters. The PSNI have been informed and we shall wait to see when charges will be filled. We’ll keep you updated.
When Injustice Becomes Law, Resistance Becomes Duty. 